Do unto others as ... wait, let's play dodgeball!
0 comments
Before I get to anything random and stupid this week, I want to start with a few serious thoughts. Forgive me, and don't worry - this won't become the norm ...
But I believe the Golden Rule is the most important aspect of life. We should all do unto others as we wish they would do unto us.
Anyone who knows me well can verify that I put others before myself in just about every situation possible, and it really doesn't seem like that hard of a thing to do.
It works with people you don't know well, like waiters and hotel clerks and taxi drivers, but it's most important with your friends.
Whenever a friend needs any sort of favor - a place to crash, a small loan, a ride somewhere or just a compliment - they know they can come to me.
Sure, I have my flaws - in fact, I have many - but as long as I continue to live my life by the simple philosophy of putting others' needs before my own, I'll stay happy.
I bring this up now because I wish more people viewed life the same way. Some people do, but not everyone. I try to surround myself with people I can trust completely and count on at all times, but I feel like my group of close friends (most of whom I've known since high school) is the exception rather than the rule.
Maybe I'm wrong - and, to be fair, karma has been kind to me in certain areas and harsh in others - but I believe looking out for people you like is the No. 1 goal you should focus on.
When I really care for someone as a friend, I'll go out of my way to do anything I can to make them happy, even if it's a major hassle for me.
Thankfully, I'm happy to say I care about a lot of people that way right now.
I hope you all can say the same thing.
Because at the end of the day, the people you care about are the only things that matter.
OK, enough of that garbage
Sorry if you hated the first few paragraphs this week - blame the five beers for the seriousness. Let's move onto some more mundane topics ...
We played our first kickball game last weekend. Sadly, we lost, 3-1 (I told you karma has been harsh in certain areas). I'm still recovering from the defeat.
We were mounting a comeback in the final inning with no outs and two runners on, but the game ended on a triple play. I guess I'd forgotten to explain the basic base-running rules to everyone on the team. (Who knew those needed explaining?)
Now I'm sad because I get uber-competitive in all sports, especially if I'm the captain.
But, despite the loss, we all had a good time and will be playing again in a few weeks. I've heard rumors that other teams are interested in playing, too - just let me know and we'll set it up.
There's been talk of organizing other Funcoast.com leagues - badminton, dodgeball, croquet, egg toss, pin the tail on the donkey ... anything works.
If anything strikes your fancy, send me an e-mail (at editor@funcoast.com) and challenge me. I guarantee I can field a team in any sport, and we'll take you on any time at any place.
Then if you beat me and my cronies, I promise I'll give you the props you deserve (yes, Jorge Santana and Co. - you guys whooped us at kickball. Just wait until the rematch - it'll be Powell Time!).
Speaking of uber-competitive
I played Nintendo Wii for the first time recently, and I love that boxing game.
My friends were a little worried I was going to accidentally punch the TV screen - I kept bouncing all over the living room, throwing jabs real close to the screen. I tried to back off and play from a distance, but I just couldn't do it.
I only played once, and thankfully I knocked my opponent out in the second round, because I was winded. That game takes some stamina.
At the Indians game last weekend, I met a friend of a friend who was bragging about how he'd never lost to his girlfriend in Wii boxing. He said he had some pretty good combo moves that helped him knock her out every time.
It seems wrong to be so happy about beating down your girlfriend in a video game boxing match. Hopefully she can get some lessons and take him down one of these days.
Making my radio debut
Last Thursday I was on Mix 102.7 for the first time ever.
Nancy Krause interviewed me about the free massage I won at the "Grey's Anatomy" party at Lyman Harbor (and, by the way, it was a very enjoyable massage).
I was only on air for about 15 seconds, and I'm sure I mumbled a few words and probably stuttered once or twice, but I didn't swear or make any inappropriate jokes, so I think I should get another shot on air. Nancy wanted me to give her a shout-out in this column. She said something about how she sends it to her mother every week - I'm not sure if she meant our regular paper or my column.
If anyone - anywhere - is sending my column to their mom on a weekly basis, you have a weird mom. My own mom doesn't even really enjoy reading these columns.
I think the only people who should find me humorous are 12-year-old boys who think it's amusing that I mentioned goat testicles in two separate paragraphs last week.
Another food award to hand out
The award for Most Valuable Condiment goes to ... steak sauce!
This might seem like an odd choice because steak sauce really only goes with one food, whereas something like ketchup goes so well with a plethora of dishes.
But although ketchup might help upgrade certain foods, it never takes an otherwise ordinary food and raises it to such great heights.
Growing up, I hated steak, and now I know why - because my parents never used steak sauce (plus they always grilled all the steaks until they were well done).
So I was left eating dry, chewy meat once every couple of weeks. It was awful.
Then I went to a restaurant and decided - on a whim - to order a steak. When the waitress offered me some A-1 Sauce, I thought I'd give it a try.
Slap me upside the head and call me Sally - that did the trick!!!
Suddenly, steak became one of the best foods ever. The tangy, zesty kick that steak sauce provides acts as the perfect balance for the rough, rugged aspect of the red meat.
You can keep trying, ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise and friends, but you'll never be this important to any food.
POWELL'S PICKS
GO TO NATIVE AMERICAN HERITAGE DAYS, May 26-27, Lyme Village, Bellevue.
There are going to be tomahawk demonstrations here. If I learned how to use a tomahawk, I would automatically become the coolest person in my office. (Right now I'm about third or fourth on the list).
SEE "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: AT WORLD'S END," opening nationwide May 25, with some screenings May 24.
Last Thursday I met a random guy who wore an eye patch. That seemed like a sign - this movie is going to be awesome.
EAT AT ZINC BRASSERIE, downtown Sandusky on Columbus Ave.
It's a new restaurant with some French cuisine. I had a pretty good sausage and tomato flatbread thing there. It was kind of like a sausage pizza. They also have cool drink glasses. We contemplated stealing two for ourselves but decided against it.
HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS, MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR JUNE 19, and go to Cameo Pizza at 6:30 p.m. that day for free pizza.
This is a meeting to get input on a new Web site created by the Register for students in the area. It's gonna be sweet because my friend Laura is involved. And who can turn down free pizza? Not me, big cats. Call Laura Collins at 419-609-5853 or e-mail her at holleratyourgirl@sanduskyregister.com for details. She's fun to talk to (if she's in a good mood).
And if you're willing to drive a little ...
WATCH THE BRAVERY, May 25 at the Agora Theatre in Cleveland.
This is a good band. If I get another crack on Mix 102.7, I might play some of their music. And then I might bust out singing some Radiohead songs, like "Karma Police" ... see, that goes back to the beginning of the column. It all ties together!
If my team loses at egg toss, I'm calling it quits. That's my best sport. Shoot me a line at editor@funcoast.com