Take a flyin' leap
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Perhaps it’s just because I held the job before he did, but whatever the reason, I always find it enjoyable to criticize my boss, Funcoast.com editor Sam Amico.Normally the assignments he gives me are a bit obscure and weak on detail, like “cover the poker championships at Kalahari, but focus on the Duck Derby because we’re making that the cover.” Or “just write about things you can do on Valentine’s Day.”But this week’s assignment takes the cake:“Write about it being Leap Year. Say whatever you want,” he tells me in an e-mail.During a phone call for clarification, this is what I get from him — “I tried looking up some events in the area that might be tied into Leap Day, but I couldn’t find any. So just write whatever.“Who is this guy? During my term in Funcoast.comLand, I never would have handed out such vague assignments. (Of course, I never would have hired a freelancer who writes as long-winded as I do, but that’s a different argument altogether.)So what do I do to get myself out of this Amico-induced conundrum?The answer is simple, and it comes in three parts:n First: Waste several paragraphs talking about anything and everything except Leap Year.Done and done.n Second: Get some Leap Year inspiration from the ultimate source of reliable information — Wikipedia.n Third: Talk about some local events going on Feb. 29 that, although they really have nothing to do with Leap Year, I find a way tie into this special, revered holiday.Since the first phase of my article plan has been covered, let’s move on to some Wikipedia information.Did you know that supporters of the revised Julian calendar add a “leap day” every four years, EXCEPT for years divisible by 100 that do not leave a remainder of 200 or 600 when divided by 900.I have no idea what that even means, but apparently it’s true.That approach matches up with the Gregorian calendar — the calendar widely used around the world — until the year 2800. The year 2800 will be a leap year in the Gregorian calendar, but not in the Julian calendar. So, if you discover a way to become immortal and live until the year 2800, you’ll have two pretty tough decisions to make: Whose calendar will you side with? And will you still keep rooting for the Browns even though they’ve never won a Super Bowl?The idea behind a leap year is that the average year is not an exact 365 days — it’s 365.2425 days. So to avoid shifting our seasons over a long stretch of time, a day needs to be added every once in awhile. Under the Gregorian calendar, a day is added every four years except in those years that are divisible by 100, UNLESS they are also divisible by 400, in which case it is a leap year. For instance, 2000 was a leap year, but 1700, 1800 and 1900 were not.There’s an old tradition that dates back several centuries that says women are allowed to make marriage proposals only in leap years.One story says Queen Margaret of Scotland actually fined men for refusing one of those marriage proposals in a leap year. Because some men didn’t like the restriction, the rule was changed to affect only those proposals actually taking place on Leap Day (which, in medieval times, was Feb. 24).So if a 400-pound, convicted killer with a unibrow asked to marry you on a Leap Day and you didn’t want to pay a fine, you’d have to say yes. (Side note: I just did a Google image search for “unibrow,” and the results were hilarious. I highly recommend it).Of course, Sam Amico is so desperate, regardless of what the date was, he’d gladly accept the proposal of any 400-pound, convicted killer with a unibrow. (Zinger!)By the way, did you know Ja Rule was born on Feb. 29? So was actor Dennis Farina (the old, boring detective on “Law & Order“). Maybe those two could do a rap song together to benefit all the other Feb. 29 babies who only get to celebrate their real birthday every four years. Ja & Order, they could be called.That covers my Wikipedia search. Let’s wrap up with some local events.If you’re looking for something to do Friday, Feb. 29, you could go to the Playmakers Civic Theatre and see “The King and I,” the popular musical by Rodgers and Hammerstein.This play is based on an autobiographical story by Anna Leonowens, but the objective accuracy of her written account remains in doubt. Much like the accuracy of the stories about those Leap Day marriage traditions I talked about remain in doubt.Or, you could go see Tight Wadd at the Pump Bar and Grille at 9:30 p.m. Just like the term “Leap Year,” Tight Wadd is a two-word phrase.Or, you could attend the “Get to Know It — Wine” program with Chaz “The Wine Guy” at the Sand Hill Winery. It might not have a whole lot to do with Leap Year, but if you drank an entire bottle of wine before reading this article, you probably enjoyed it a heck of a lot more than you would if you read it sober.
